Saving Sassy

My cat, Sassy is her name, has been alive for fourteen years now. And like my niece (who is also fourteen), I figured she - Sassy - must have passed the 'age of accountably' some time ago, and so it was time to sit her down and explain to her the ways of God so that she might accept Jesus into her heart.

I picked her up and sat her on a spot on the couch next to me and open my bible beginning in Exodus.

I explained to her that in ancient Egypt cats were worshipped by the great Pharoahs of Egypt, and that it was this desire of cats - not being content to have simply been made by God - but this desire to actually be god as they were in Egypt, that led to the "fall" of all cats, just as it had to humans.

Then I took her to Romans where it says that "all" - all cats that is - "have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Rom. 3:23). But then I explained to her the good news: that God came down to earth in the form of an evolved ape, he clothed himself in the flesh of this evolved tree swinger - to represent all in the animal kingdom, including cats - to defeat sin in his animal skin (Rom. 8:3).

I asked her if she understood what I was telling her, to which I received a blank stare of affirmation. I took that as a yes and asked her if she would like to receive Jesus into her heart - another blank stare of affirmation. I bowed my head and told her to pray this prayer in her heart. When I was done I looked up and saw Sassy starring out the window, obviously touched with a new outlook on life as she sat reflectively watching the birds as they flew by; occasionally licking her chops.

I went to bed peacefully that night knowing that if Sassy died before I wake, that she would be embraced by the evolved ape-ish arms of Jesus, and spend eternity with my neanderthal cousins - and perhaps the fly I squashed yesderday, that is, if the fly had accepted Jesus - in heaven.
(Being facetious of course)

Review of Saving Darwin: How to be a Christian and Believe in Evolution to follow.

Derek